By Kristine Kern
Review Staff Writer
Losing a child is the most painful experience a parent can go through. When losing a child to a miscarriage or still birth, the grieving process feels rushed as you are saying hello and goodbye at the same time. A new device has become available to hospitals called the ‘cuddle cot’ – a cooling device for a bassinet or crib so that the baby’s body can remain in the hospital room, giving the family time to say a proper goodbye.
Alyssa (Tony) Thier of Adrian, Nikki (Jon) McLendon of Luverne, and Krissi (Phil) Butenhoff of Winona, are not only sisters and sister-in-law, but they share that grief as each has lost a child to a miscarriage or stillbirth. As they grieved, they knew it was important to each of them that their babies, Paisley, Emmett and Keeston be remembered. While at Faith’s Lodge, a child bereavement retreat that Nikki and Alyssa went to after the loss of their babies, they learned of ‘cuddle cots.’ The three women decided to raise money to donate a cuddle cot to Sanford and Avera Hospitals in Sioux Falls, SD. The process took a year to organize.
During this time the women designed T-shirts with the word ‘LOVE’ on the front. The V is made with two footprints, a pink footprint for Paisley, and a blue footprint for Keeston. The back of the shirt carried the heartbreaking statistic that one in four women
will have a pregnancy end in stillbirth or a miscarriage. The shirts were sold through an online site called “Booster” where you could purchase a shirt or make a donation to their cause. The site allowed people to share who they were purchasing the shirt for or making a donation in memory of. Alyssa wrote, “It was amazing to see and bring awareness to this reality, that even in our local community, the number of babies that have been lost.” Through T-shirt sales and donations they raised $6,200. “We were so overwhelmed and grateful for the response we had. We donated $2,900 to both Sanford and Avera Hospitals in Sioux Falls. Although we hate the idea of cuddle cots being used, we realize, through statistics, they will be,” Alyssa commented. The remaining $400 was donated to Faith’s Lodge to help other families in their grieving process.
The women have no immediate plans for another fundraiser, but Alyssa said that does not mean there won’t be another one. Speaking for the group, Alyssa comments, “For all of us it’s important that Paisley, Emmett and Keeston be remembered. Creating the shirts allowed us to share our story, as well as break the silence and bring awareness to the fact that one in four women will lose a baby of their own. No one needs to feel alone.”
